4 posts tagged “vida”

I am wheeled into a room labeled, ‘OB/GYN check in’ a polite nurse greets me and straps two monitors over me.  The ob/gyn on call begins to introduce herself with that loud voice, as if I am deaf, she has the nerve to ask how I am feeling.  I grunt back, “In the middle of contraction”.  I didn’t want to talk to her, I didn’t want to engage in a relationship with her, I was awaiting the midwife on call.  At that moment, Susan walks in and takes over, the ob/gyn got nothing out of me.  Susan is one of four on the UCLA CNM team.  I had only seen her a handful of times throughout my prenatal appointments but she was the last midwife I saw.  My prenatal appointment was April 1, Tuesday, that’s when we learned I was 1-2 cm and she could feel the head.  Today, I wonder if she had an idea that Vida’s birth day was around the corner.  She scanned my birth plan and was okay with everything listed.

Susan began her cervical check, it was uncomfortable, when her hand re-emerged she brought the mucus plug out.  Pablo looked concerned and she reassured him that was exactly what it was supposed to look like, stingy and bloody.  She reported that I was already 6 cm.  It’s about noon by now, Becky is impressed that I have been coping so well, considering how far along I was.  My blood pressure was taken and it was high, it was constantly monitored and it remained high.  Thanks to the midwifery model of care, I was simply monitored, it did not escalate to excessive fetal monitoring or drug therapy.  I had a clean record of blood pressure all throughout my pregnancy.  Some women simply have high blood pressure due to the stress of being in a hospital environment brings.

I was then moved to the labor room, spacious, plantation shutters, a long couch, a more welcoming environment.  Becky began strongly engaging in her coaching and assistance.  I resumed my frequent bathroom breaks, altogether experienced about 3 contractions on the toilet.  I remembered Ina Mae Gaskin’s words, ‘loose in the mouth, loose in the bottom’.  It’s easier to open on the toilet as that is a natural place to release, I would lean back on the bowl, and open my mouth wide, releasing my jaw (it’s tricky, actually).  Upon my last visit to the bathroom I decided to experience some contractions standing up against the cool marble tiles.  I distinctly recall looking up to the right into the corner of the ceiling and entering a ‘trance’.  Had anyone filmed that moment, they would think I was overtaken, possessed.  I was truly in ‘Laborland’ as described in Birthing From Within.  The bathroom was equipped with a roomy, handicap-sized shower with a detachable shower head.  It looked inviting and Becky was prepared to continue my laboring in there, Pablo had even changed into his swim trunks.  I returned to the bed for blood pressure monitoring and to get Susan’s read on my progress.  After that initial cervical check at 6 cm, she never conducted another internal exam.  I was so impressed.  She simply pulled up a chair and kept everyone company.  Well, it was decided that I was too far along for shower-time.  She asked if we had any labor music.  Pablo attempted to play an Enya CD on their player, but it wasn’t working.  So he had his laptop and played the CD, after that was finished we switched to tunes by Tori.  The CNM commented that it was an ‘odd’ choice for labor music.  I enjoyed it because I have so many of her lyrics memorized and could 'sing' them while still expending energy on pushing.  Shortly, before it came time for Vida to crown, Jackie’s Strength came up on the playlist, perfect timing. 

I remember telling Becky that now I understood what women meant when they described contractions as riding a wave of ocean water.  It made perfect sense.  She wonderfully mothered me and Pablo would speak to me as well.  Sometimes, I wasn’t interested in what he had to say, so I would raise my fingers to his lips to get him to stop talking.  When I would hold onto a contraction, Susan would firmly remind me to let it go, this helped me cope with the discomfort.  Susan asked if I was ready to push.  I thought to myself, How the hell do I know?  I have never done this before.  I went along and said ‘yes’.  The first pushes were futile and awkward, I was using my legs instead of my core.  I knew I was supposed to push as if it were the biggest poo of my life but I didn’t know how to engage my core.

  Shortly thereafter, the birth bar comes out and I am able to rest my legs against and use Becky’s fabric to push with my core, the birth bar also alleviated the cramping on my outer left thigh and my calf on the right side.  Susan began to take over the pushing more assertively.  Becky focused on me, applying cool washcloths to my forehead and reminding me to work with my baby.  When I made all the progress I could with the birth bar and fabric, Susan recommended a side-lying position.  She noticed the expression on my face and commented that it sounded counter-intuitive but it would work.  We needed to get Vida under my pubis symphis bone.  At this point the nursing team and an ob/gyn resident are preparing the birthing equipment.  Internally, I was getting excited, I knew if they were moving along then I truly was making progress. 

The real work begins, it is approximately 1:30 pm.

I would push with loud, primal grunts and focus all my energy toward my middle visualizing it was sending Vida down the birth canal.  When I was doing well, Susan and the team would call out, “Hold it.”  I spoke up and told them that I interpreted it as, “STOP!”  They conferred that it is misleading and wondered how many labors they attended that went unnecessarily long.  I told them I would prefer they gave me a count (which surprised them), as in push until we get to 5, or something like that.  As the contraction came I often pushed at the onset and felt the most progress with the 2^nd and 3^rd pushing sequences of the contraction.  Again, I spoke up and told Susan that the first one feels like a waste, there is a noticeable difference in the pressure.  She suggested to just breathe as the contraction begins and not to push until it almost peaks.  This was hard to gage as I have never done this before and visualizing the contraction didn’t work for me because it never felt like there was a distinctive beginning, middle, and end.  Susan has plenty of experience and could tell by reading my facial expressions, she would assist me, and the whole room would cheer me on to let me know that they could see the head.  Yet, the head would creep back up because I hadn’t pushed her far enough.  (It takes 3 STRONG pushes: 2 steps forward, 1 step back, to make progress down the birth canal.)  At that point I tell Becky and Pablo that I need their hands, her to my left and him to my right.  I tell them that if I am sending this much energy out, I need them to return it to me to make the 3^rd and 4^th pushes truly count.  From that point forward, I pushed with all my might, probably hurting Becky’s hand in the process.  Now, I could truly feel Vida passing through me, at one point I even felt a kick! 

The mirror from above is angled for me to view her emerge.  It gave me a boost of confidence when I could see a sliver of her head, now I believed I was making progress.  Again the delivery team scurries and makes some more arrangements as it is imminent that she will crown.  The ob/gyn resident takes over as Susan monitors her, she explains that she is applying mineral oil and performing perineal massage to make Vida’s passage easier and for me not to tear.  That felt incredibly relaxing, I could feel the stretchiness factor and it calmed me.  I had heard of the infamous Ring of Fire at the moment the baby crowns, but it never happened, at the most there was an intense, brief sting on one side.  It seemed as though she crowned easily.  I never felt the shoulders on the following push and as she was slipping out, the team told me to reach for her as they lifted her from within me.  I brought her to my belly and wanted to bring her to my chest but was advised not to as the cord was short.  Apparently, I was also bleeding more than the typical amount.  While we celebrated her birth at 3:46 pm and waited for her first cry, Susan was attending to my bleeding.  The nurses monitored Vida’s breathing, it was gurgling with amniotic fluid.  They performed some suctioning and she let out a big cry, at that moment, Pablo’s eyes watered and tears fell.  I was in a euphoric state, smiling and almost giggling.  Pablo later told me that I smiled through some contractions, which I do recall, and that to him it looked as if I was in the midst of an orgasm.  I was delighted to hear this as one of the birth stories in Birth as We Know It, describes this sensation.  Pablo and I kissed at various times throughout my labor, those sweet kisses released endorphins and hormones that contributed to my ‘painless’ labor and delivery.  Yes, I said it, painless.  It was always intense and discomforting but not painful.  Recovery was painful, recovery had me pleading for some strong Motrin.

The integrity of the birth plan was maintained even as Vida received her newborn check up.  Pressure is then applied to my uterus, now that HURT!  That drove me to tears.  It’s a necessary evil to monitor how much blood loss there is-if it gushes that’s bad. At this point Susan is concerned about the bleeding and strongly suggests an IV of pitocin which helps stop bleeding (This had something to do with my placenta being low lying).  We go with her suggestion and her team completes the delivery of the placenta, that was a sight to watch.   Meanwhile, Pablo keeps Vida company as she is checked over, he talks to her and plays the Glow worm for her, instantly her cries soften.  My bleeding is stabilized and Vida is fine, I cradle her in my arms and still feel surreal.  It’s true that the moment she’s out, all the discomfort and struggle disappears.  As I held her, it felt as if the whole 38 weeks flashed before me and as if my mind was trying to process how I arrived at motherhood.  To hold her and acknowledge she was actually mine, it took about 2 days to truly own the motherhood moment.  I was so sore while in the hospital it was hard for my mind to concentrate on her.  Once the delivery was completed, we awaited a wheel chair to get to our private room.  I was impatient as the mattress on the delivery bed did not provide much comfort.  I then decided we could walk over to the room ourselves.  As we turned the corner, I glanced forward and saw Susan entering another room, as she watched me walk myself to the private recovery room she hollered to me,

“Good for you.”

 I attribute the ease of my labor and delivery to all the reading and research I did while pregnant.  I love to explore new topics.  I purchased about 5 pregnancy books and devoured them, we hired a doula, I participated in MDC (www.mothering.com), I took childbirth classes with the best, Ana Paula, and most of all I have a tremendously supportive husband who loves me unconditionally.  When I would read the books or watch birth videos, some critical messages or scenes were stored in my mind, subconsciously.  It’s as if my body connected with my mind to retain the information it needed to assist me in accomplishing my goal of a 100% natural childbirth.  There were moments in the most intense moments of active labor that you your ‘human’ brain interferes with your ‘primal’ brain.  Going into the birth I was aware of this from my childbirth classes and would remind myself to, release and let go. 

As a first timer, the only and best advice I can offer is to let your body do the ‘work’, listen to it.  Especially in the last trimester, if you feel a chiropractic adjustment is needed, go for it.  If you sense a prenatal massage will help with your leg cramps, book it.  If you have a ‘nesting’ urge, give in to it.  If you want to practice your breathing and stretching exercises before going to bed, you better do it.  These are all ‘signs’ that your body owns the birthing process, cooperate and you’ll increase the likelihood that the end result will be in your favor.

Baby shower(s): Yes, I was super blessed with 2 back - to - back showers.  Here are some highlights:

IMG_2288

1. She has enough clothes for the next 9 months.  She'll mostly live in onesies, so now I have a legitimate reason to invest in Babylegs.  I love the Etsy website, it's a way I can support WAHM (work at home moms), Knotty Baby Wear's creator is quitting the biz!  I look forward to some deep discounts!  I have yet to make a purchase so I am super excited.
    Pablo was so against these if the baby was going to be a boy, even the gender neutral colors.  He said leggings don't belong on boys.  Ay, the machismo.

2. The cake(s)...mmmm...Love, absolutely love Porto's cakes.  Ours had fresh bananas with custard between chocolate cake and Cuban cake (yellow cake with Brandy).  My mom's cake was fresh strawberries between cuban cake and yellow cake.

3. Games: As a teacher, I wanted some games that required some mental skill: we had a fill-in-the-blank nursery

IMG_2270

IMG_2263

4. Friends and family: Vida's godmother (Lisa) and Lauren coordinated our shower.  Lauren's other half, Brian shared his birthday with us (it was the same day as the shower).  At my mom's place, it was emotional to look around the room and realize that most of the people have known me since I was an infant!  My mom is Lisa's godmother, so it's just beautiful to see it come full circle.

Update: At 5:00 pm we purchased the nursery set online from costco.com and it will arrive in 3-4 weeks, keep your fingers crossed it comes in time for the baby shower on March 15th.  We are going to paint the room next weekend. 

I am not one to focus on making sure the walls coordinate with the rug and the furniture.  In our apartment, all of our walls are still 'adobe white'.  Vida's bedroom will be the first room we paint, a garden or sea foam green most likely.  Anyhow, one thing Pablo and I decided on long ago was the nursery theme: fairies and butterflies for a girl and bears for a boy. 

One day in the first trimester I was browsing Costco online.  Did you know you can plan everything from a baby to a funeral online at Costco?!  They sell caskets!  They also sell all the basics of a wedding, the flowers along with the invitations, and other necessities for the big day.  I love Costco for many reasons, mainly overall quality of products.  They are selling a fairies and butterflies nursery set.  I knew it was just a matter of time before it was discounted, it seems that all of their furniture sets eventually get $500 knocked off.  I checked it last week and YES!  The 7-piece set is down to $1000.  To me, that is still INSANELY expensive, but it's a theme she can grow with, the bed is convertible and the decorative knobs on the furniture are reversible to a plain knob.  The great thing is that it's not going to cost us $1000, as we have $112 rebate from our AMX Costco card for our yearly reward.  Also, Pablo has just sold his Halo edition Xbox with a bundle of games for $110 and we have some left over Christmas gift money.  I am also working part time.  For example, today I earned $200 in 4 hours by selecting teachers.  We could get away with spending only $500 out of our own pocket!  Hooray!  Now that sounds like a fair deal for a 7-piece set!